Spirits are down.
I got a full night’s sleep and got up this morning at 7:30 with the full intention of hitting the gym. I went through the motions. At 8 AM, I realized I had absolutely no desire to lift. None, whatsoever. It’s so strange. When I think about it, I haven’t had much of a desire to lift in months. I recognize that I don’t need to lift. This is something I’ve choosen to do, and if I don’t want to do it, I don’t have to. I just haven’t felt particularly better after lifting.
Not lifting is fine. But what perturbs me is my constant need for rest and sleep. I remember last semester, I fought this urge. I’d just push myself, and it wasn’t really a problem. I napped for another three hours, and how do I feel? I have no more energy, nor do I feel any more motivated to do anything. It certainly felt nice to nap. I haven’t allowed myself enough naps over the years. It’s just I never feel sated, I want to continue to nap.
Maybe it is plain loneliness. I just wonder when I should stop going along with this feeling and do something about it. Struggle? I haven’t the spirit to struggle.
My goal is to take care of basic needs, in the hopes I can give myself the best chance. Can’t go beyond unless I do the bare minimum first.
wow, how familiar. I have not been motivated to exercise much in the last two months myself (I guess I was averaging about 3-5 times a week at my best) and the results with exercising half heartedly maybe once a week are that I sleep an hour or two more a night and just like you said, I wake up still tired, I NEVER FEEL rested and sated, much less actually energetic and positive. Yes, of courselonliness contributes to the lack of motivation and/or depression, but I guess it’s the pure lack of exercise that devolves living into a half asleep half awake state, no highes, no rest enough. I did another half hearted workout this morning, anything is better than nothing, trying to motivate to get back on track, baby steps at a time. Life is little more than survival if I live at the level I’ve been at recently.
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Maybe you need a new hobby. 😀
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