rolf.

A man and a woman are seated beside one another at a bar getting rather tipsy. With both visibly depressed, the man asks the woman why she’s so down to which she replies, “My husband left me because he said I was too kinky in bed.”

“What a coincidence!” he said, “My wife just left me. She said I was too kinky in bed, too.”

So they start talking and find that they have much in common, so they decide to go to the woman’s apartment and have kinky sex. When they arrive at her apartment, she tells him she needs a few minutes so she can slip into something more comfortable.

Moments later, she emerges from the bathroom with a tight black leather outfit, complete with whip, handcuffs, a strap-on, and a 12-inch studded dildo. She then hurries into the kitchen, and returns with Tabasco sauce, whipped cream, and a rolling pin. Just as she completes her preparation, she notices that the man is putting on his coat and is heading towards the door.

“What’s going on?” she asks. “I thought you wanted to get kinky?”

The man turns to her and says, “Lady, I just fucked your dog and shit in your purse. I’m all done.”