Make the Voice Stop

I’ve been trying to meditate, ever since some woman at a drain party was telling me how she was going on a marathon meditation retreat where that’s all you do 10 days straight – no talking, no nothing.  My attempts have been failing spectacularly.  It actually stresses me out more.  The main reason being that I have an incessant inner monologue that never, ever stops.  NEVER.  Here I was worrying that I talk to myself sometimes, when in fact, I’m always talking to myself, just not always out loud. 

Lately I’ve been catching myself narrating my life as if I were writing a book.  Sigh.

I can’t shut it off.  When I try to focus on something, I focus on it through words.  "breathing… breath in… "  I can’t remember how to experience things non-verbally.  

Dear Diary, here is the worst confession of all.  I’ve realised that the words don’t even stop when I’m… when I’m…  when I’m having sex.

Oh god, someone help me please.   Now I’m aware of it, it’s driving me crazy and frankly it’s creepy.    Plus, I’m pretty sure I have Adult ADD and I need to learn to focus my mind before I go back to uni next year.  

Or is it normal to constantly be talking, talking, talking inside your head?