The way you make me kill

Why would anyone whistle along to Michael Jackson’s The Way You Make Me Feel?

BECAUSE THEY HATE ME AND THEY WANT A MURDEROUS RAGE TO BOIL UP INSIDE ME, WITH NO RELEASE AND NO OPTION BUT TO TURN THAT HATRED INWARD WHERE IT CAN SLOWLY EAT AWAY AT ME FROM THE INSIDE OUT, SIMILAR TO THE WAY THAT HUMAN SPONTANEOUS COMBUSTION DOES SO BUT OVER A MUCH LONGER TIME SPAN.

Sorry, my boss is doing the afore mentioned and it’s making me wish life was a Choose Your Own Adventure, so that I could keep my bookmark on this page, turn to the page where I stab him in the head, and then see whether it will really turn out as  badly as  I think it would.  Maybe it wouldn’t.  Maybe it would be the start of a whole new fantastic life.  And if it wasn’t, I could just flip back to this page and take the more passive aggressive option.  Something like mental torture.   Or blackmail.  Not to get a payrise, just for fun.   Okay, and maybe an extra day off this week.

Something like pointing out that I know through a highly credible source just how much our department spent on Christmas decorations this year for the decorating competition.

Like pointing out that the amount spent was more than what first prize was worth (a $1000 outing budget).

And then pointing out that the amount spent exceeded the job sharing arrangement I proposed in order to keep two casual staff members on during the 6 week holiday period instead of putting them on forced unpaid leave.

And that I also know that 5 temporary staff were kept on solely to make decorations full-time and that this was billed to the client.  And that our managing director would probably freak out if she found out about all of the above.

Knowledge is power.  Having a heart made of vengeance and Chuck Norris’ stool sample helps a bit too. 

edit: Mission accomplished, I get Wednesday off this week.  5 day weekend!!