Another time.

I came here looking for someone, I had no idea that my old diary was still here. I had a couple of entries & man, were they sad & depressing. 2012 was a lifetime ago & I’m def not that person anymore, thank goodness. If only I could go back and say, that dude is NOT worth the angst, the tears, the depression, kick his butt to Timbuktu, but of course I wouldn’t be the me today unless I went through all that bullshit. Stronger, wiser, don’t take bullshit kind of person. I don’t have rose glasses anymore, I smashed them lol

I feel like my life has been one revolving door of groundhog day of bullshit. I’m still waiting for “those better days are coming” quote, I think honestly you have to seize the moments, otherwise you’re just in limbo waiting for better days. Been my experience anyhow.

I still have depression that has been exacerbated by repeated lockdowns & the death of a really close friend. But not to the degree of 2012 & not suicidal. I’m alot wiser & more grown up these days, p’raps more numb mostly and over the ever-growing bullshit of life and people mostly, I still have a sense of humour which helps with life. Laughter really helps and music and nature. And look after your health, that’s your greatest wealth. Speaking from experience.

 

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