The Great Rice Debacle.

I stopped by my favorite Mexican food drive-thru restaurant today at lunch and ordered a small rice.

"I’m sorry" the voice said, "We don’t have Slice."  "No, I want rice." I replied.

The voice said, "Oh, I’m sorry, we dont have Sprite either."

I was starting to get a little exasperated. "Not Slice. Not Sprite. Rice, R-I-C-E." The voice apologetically replied, "Oh, I’m sorry, we don’t have RC Cola either."

I could feel my blood pressure rising and my face turning red.

Then, it struck me just how ridiculous this whole thing was. "No, No, No" I laughed. "I don’t want a drink. I want rice. You know, rice? R-I-C-E. Rice."

"Ma’am", the voice angrily responded, "We don’t have Slice. We don’t have Sprite. We don’t have RC Cola. We just have Pepsi, Dr. Pepper, root beer and 7Up".

At this point, I threw back my head and roared with laughter. The voice did not find this amusing. Through my peals of laughter I heard it sarcastically say "Hel-uh-oh? Are you, like, there?"

Taking a deep, determined breath I tried again. "I want rice. Rice. It’s orange. It’s a grain. It’s called rice. It’s not a drink. It’s something you eat. You eat it with a fork. Rice. R-I-C-E. RICE!"

"Ohhhhh" the voice answered. "You want a side of rice." "Yes, yes that’s it, a side of rice."

What a relief! "Will that be all?" the voice inquired. "Would you like anything else with your rice?"

"Oh yes", I politely responded, "I’d like a small Slice please".