PEODOPHILES ARE COMMON•DIVORCE•FIRST SMOKE

Went shopping with Soph yesterday. She stole $250 worth of stuff. I stole less that that. She’s damn fun to shop with God I love her right now.

Then we went bowling with a group of 8 people. It was so fun, but Rob is depressed and even though I told him I’m here for him whenever he wants to talk, I don’t know what he’s gonna make of me cause I don’t know him very well at all. I’ve only known him about 2 months, and he’s tighter with a few of my friends than me, should I ask him more about how his feelings or leave it to the others? I don’t think it would be right to leave it, and I think some people don’t understand sh*t like this well enough to know they should talk to the person about it. Talking’s better than cutting, just harder to do. He knows I cut, he seen the scars and probably heard it from people, even though I denied it and made excuses, there’s no way he could not know. Maybe that will make him more confident talking to me, knowing I feel stuff too.

After bowling I slept over at Soph’s Dad’s house. She’s so obviously upset about her parents breaking up. She acts mad and bitchy toward her dad so much and tells him she hates staying at his house and that he’s got no say in what she does and doesn’t do cause he’s not the responsible parent. I don’t think she really thinks it, I just think she’s sad. It’s been a year now. She’ll get better with time.

Soph had her first smoke last night. She was scared her dad was gonna catch us and kick me out of his apartment. She says she doesn’t know why anybody would smoke. I only do cause after a smoke I’m calmber. They make me feel…I don’t know…Settled. It was so funny we smoked in our undies out on the balcony and the people in the building across from us were staring and waving. They were old men though. Only teenage girls know the true extent of how many men are peodophiles. We’re the ones who get the wistles, stupid pickup lines, beeps, comments and winks from people 5 times our age. It’s flattering though. I’ve learnt to be grateful for it.

Congratulations for making it to the end of this entry. Now you know why I don’t write about my friends, entries with them in them are f*cking boring. But this diary is for me more than the people reading. I want notes though. Cya!