The World Won’t Stop

How to address this?  My absent biological father passed away today.  He was so absent that I am not even sure how old he was.  I know his last couple of days were harder than they should have been.  He told my sister that he wasn’t going to die via cancer.  LMFAO.  The Universe has a funny way.

I know there is someone out there who is very much grieving the passing; I am not grieving his passing.  I’m numb in that aspect.  I am PISSED in others.  I am angry that there are people who got a version of him that my sister and I didn’t get.  I am angry that the support person that I needed for all of this died before my parents did.  And I am extremely tired.  I am trying to figure out how in the world I am going to possibly get to where I need to be and the math ain’t mathin.  I just started a new job.  I don’t have the money for something like this.  My sister and I are trying to come up with something.  It’s just so hard.  It is hard to give to the people that had that version of him so much when we wouldn’t be getting what we needed from him if the roles were reversed.

Send us good juju.