I can’t take this 😣

My daughter tonight was crying when her dad yelled at her.

I was hugging her and telling her everything’s ok.  She kept telling me that’s she’s sorry and that she’s not a bad kid.  I told her she’s not a bad kid, whatsoever. Then she asks me why Dad was always mad at her? And she also tells me how she feels like Dad looks at her like she’s weird.

I wish I had the answers.  I wish I knew what to do and didn’t feel so isolated and stuck!

My kids want so much to feel important to their Dad.  Today, for work, my husband left without saying goodbye to the kids.  My eldest son tried to run as fast as he could to catch him…but once my husband was at the door, my son was just really sad.  I tried to tell him, “He may not be at the car yet, maybe you can still catch him.”  He just said, with his head down, “No. That’s ok,” and he walked away.

They want to be acknowledged by him, but sometimes the are too scared to say it.

It feels like the only time he interacts with them is if he is yelling at them.  They aren’t “bad” kids…yet that’s how he makes them feel and even tells them that.

I wish I knew of some easy solution.  I really do.  I can’t take my kids hurting…

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January 5, 2022

I don’t know if this is the case, but he may just be having issues in the head that he can’t or won’t talk about…or maybe doesn’t know how to.

My dad was angry nearly all the time when I was a kid and I couldn’t figure it.  Looking back, I’m pretty sure it was work.  At the high times, he was stressed the hell out in the entirety and worked 18 hours a day at the high point of the season (he was a golf course superintendent) but when it was winter and hours were minimal he was in a better place.

I’m not (necessarily) saying this is precisely what’s going on, but just my own experience as a kid where I was on the business end of his anger a lot of the time.

I hope this helps (even if only fractionally) and I do hope he can voice whatever’s going on with him at some point without going into a rage on it.

January 5, 2022

Men are so different about communications, emotions, feelings.  Here’s hoping you are able to talk about it.  Sending hugs and good vibes.