Hello! My name is Amber. I’ve had this OD for a LONG time! Ha ha. Started this in 2004 ... and still going!

I’m a mom of 4, I homeschool, I love Jesus, and I am married.

My Open Diary mirrors my teenage self to my current self. The obvious difference is that I’ve changed A LOT compared to some “entries” you may find, lol. If you are a stalker, you will notice, LOL!

Much Love and God Bless!

Latest Entry

Frustration and Angry

October 20, 2023
So I’m currently dealing with a healing process that (to be honest) is taking me almost 20 years to deal with.  I have some things that I want to vent and (hopefully) I can see this as a thing I can let go of instead of building it up and allowing it to fester. One…
Continue Reading...

Recent Entries

  • Living life without feeling bound
    September 23, 2023
    It’s taken me years to finally saying to myself, “You know - I’ve had enough.” The amount of time I’ve spent dwelling on things, thinking that I was afraid to be alone, etc…it’s all made me realize how much time and how many years I’ve wasted. Today is a new day and I’m not wasting…
    Continue Reading...
  • I can’t take this 😣
    January 5, 2022
    My daughter tonight was crying when her dad yelled at her. I was hugging her and telling her everything’s ok.  She kept telling me that’s she’s sorry and that she’s not a bad kid.  I told her she’s not a bad kid, whatsoever. Then she asks me why Dad was always mad at her? And…
    Continue Reading...
  • Things that I struggle with…
    December 8, 2021
    These are the things I’ve been struggling with for years.  It’s just something that I want to recognize for myself so I know how to deal with it or maybe get help for it in the future. Body Dysmorphia:  this is something I struggled with since I was a kid.  It started when I was…
    Continue Reading...
  • How My Children Save My Life, Daily.
    October 5, 2021
    Every time I write in this diary, it's always something dramatic, something depressing, or I'm sharing the deepest parts of my heart that would be inappropriate to share publicly. However, even in my most depressing and sad moments...I look at my kids and realize how deep my love is for them and ...
    Continue Reading...
  • Maybe Something Is Wrong With Me
    September 24, 2021
    Today was not a good day.  I've been crying all day. It started out ok until one situation that happened. Well, I came across a video of a girl who was wearing tight jeans (and was seeking attention) was walking around with a phone in her pocket while others were staring at her backside. Obviousl...
    Continue Reading...
  • Trying: Just My Deep Thoughts For Today
    September 20, 2021
    I’m trying to be more social and reach out to people.  Some days it’s really hard. For over 12 years, I have pushed people away for various reasons.  One reason is that I have a hard time trusting people…but I’m getting better.  Another reason is I’m afraid to get close to people just to lose&hel...
    Continue Reading...
  • Panic..
    September 6, 2021
    Worked a double today. Had a panic attack at work... Great...
    Continue Reading...
  • Hopeless
    September 4, 2021
    Sometimes I think things are getting better... Then something happens to tell me it's not... I have no one to go to... I’m lost.
    Continue Reading...
  • Little Girl Loved Dresses: by Amber
    July 16, 2021
    There once was a little girl who loved to wear a dress. She loved them more than normal, I confess. When she wore a dress, she felt like a feminine-super hero! She felt like she could conquer the world; even defeat an enemy like Nero! To her, a dress was like wearing Superman’s cape. She…
    Continue Reading...

Search Entries

  • Use dropdowns or search terms above to find entries.

Chapters