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First day of a new life

June 11, 2024
I woke up craving. Even now I’m craving for a quick high. Once you know what a high feels like, you want it more and more. The only problem is, when the high dies, it makes you feel low again. Even though I’ve been craving, I spoke to my dad on the phone, walked in…
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Recent Entries

  • Rock bottom
    June 11, 2024
    I’m watching teen mom to remind myself that I don’t have kids. I saw an episode where Maci told her friend that her ex has to reach “rock bottom”, before he can really get out of his addiction. I think God has had so much mercy on me. All my ups and downs but He…
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  • Thinking too much
    June 11, 2024
    So many bad thoughts are flooding my mind…it’s like a millions messages are trying to catch up for lost time. Im thinking about being 40. I’m in major pain. It hurts in my soul then trickles out of my eyes. I need help. I’m too tired to cry. I pray God won’t give up on…
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  • No one to talk to
    June 11, 2024
    How do I have 670 contacts in my phone but no one to talk to? I don’t know what to do or think. I’m lost because I don’t know where to start with God.   i need help    
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  • 3AM
    May 24, 2024
    It’s past 3am and I’m still up. That’s what happens when I stop smoking weed…. I stay up for a while then go to sleep 48 hours later. I’m so exhausted but I’m thinking about the flowers Abdul bought me.   Abdul bought roses for all teachers and I was the only one who was…
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  • Hello
    May 24, 2024
    Hi
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  • When I work
    April 22, 2024
    It’s  5am. I have to wake up in two hours. I keep wak in g up every two hours. I decided to put this in writing in case I decide I want to go back to smoking…   note to self: YOU HAVE TERRIBLE SLEEP…it’s like only 3 hours a night YOU SWEAT DURING THE…
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  • Broken record
    April 17, 2024
    today is Wednesday. I probably smoked my last blunt around 9:30p last night. I know I always say I quit. but I mean it this time. ive been struggling with weed forever. I was able to quit for lent…but then I went back to it. So stupid incidents have been occurring over weed and my…
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  • Trust issues
    February 29, 2024
    I read one of my friends on here was being harassed. I know I never met this friend but I can tell she’s a kind person. That’s so unfortunate. It spurred me to make most of my journal entries private. One of the OGs on here also is my friend…I’m actually grateful for all the…
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  • d.a.r.e
    April 26, 2018
    i quit smoking weed today. Father, please help me not ever smoke again. I have tried to quit so many times and usually I can last up to three months before I crave pot again. I know how it negatively affects my body and how I always get the losing hand when it comes to…
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