Here’s Why Life Feels Impossible!

Dear Diary,

I’m sick of working hard for nothing, struggling to get ahead in life. It feels like I’m merely existing, not truly living. The thought of working until retirement, endlessly giving to a society that offers nothing in return when I need it, is exhausting.

I’ve followed the playbook all my life, doing everything I was told would lead to success and happiness. But now, in my early 40s, I yearn to escape and live a freer, more fulfilling life. The weight of society’s expectations and responsibilities feels unbearable. I can’t shake the feeling that I’ve been pre-programmed to believe in a way of living that doesn’t serve me. Despite working hard all these years, I feel empty and unfulfilled.

I’m lost, with no clear direction. Every time I try to change, I face obstacles—red tape, self-doubt, and endless questions. How can I make this work? Half of my life has been spent meeting the expectations of others—society, the government, people around me. But now I want something different. I want to seek an alternative path, but what does that even look like?

Am I alone in these feelings? Do others feel this same sense of emptiness and longing for change? And if they do, how do they cope? What are their mechanisms for finding peace and purpose?

I hope that by writing this down, I can begin to untangle these thoughts and find some clarity.

Until next time, Me.