Feeling sad/no sm

Dear Jesus,

I pray that you are doing well. I pray that my life comes together. So much sadness today. I think it was because I was on titktok alllll day. I was following up on the Diddy trials, The Little Mermaid doing a restraining order against her husband, and a rapper being stabbed and wrongly accused in jail. I fell asleep to something negative repeating on titktok…I’m not sure what. All I know is I deleted TikTok immediately. I will not get sucked into social media.
My television has no sound due to me blasting the volume. The picture works so I just watch everything in captions until my speaker comes through the mail. My speaker comes in on Sunday.
i have a busy weekend. Even today is busy with washing my hair, going to may parents house, picking up mail, washing clothes, rollersetting hair, going to work, and then performing at the club tonight. It’s only an 8 minute set so I’ll be performing maybe 5 songs…I have no idea which yet though.
I feel sadness. It’s annoying. I am not sure what will make me feel better but cleaning myself is a start. The whole beauty routine and then head straight to church in an hour. I’m not sure. I really don’t know. All I know Jesus is- I need you.

Jesus, I want happiness in my life. I try not to think of the past but it surrounds me. It’s everywhere. I feel so sad allll the time. Like I’m just going through the motions of life.

im always sad and I don’t want to be. Please Father, take this depression off of me. I want to experience joy! Tonight should be joy….seeing my parents should be joy… a lot of things should be joy. But it’s not. It makes me sad that I’m not in a better position in life.

Please guide me . Please help me mentally. Most of all, please comfort me in your loving arms. In Jesus name…amen