DailyOM: Lesson 1 Soul Narrative vs Self- Defeating Story

What matters is not what happened, but what you felt.

Why do the same issues show up?  People pushing the same buttons.  Different people behaving in exactly the same way.

When we feel like a victim, we feel a great sense of powerlessness.

Reframe those tensions as opportunities to strengthen emotional muscles, increase your sense of purpose – engage in “narrative alchemy.”

-Write a narrative about the challenging person that prompted you to sign up for the course:

Drew cannot see outside himself.  Drew is selfish.  Drew hurts me.  Drew’s main focus was wooing me, courting me, and now he’s had what he wants and is out.  I am not enough.  I am not evolved.  I cannot keep up.  He is seeking a connection that he is lacking from me in our relationship.  

We met while I was vulnerable.  He was safe.  And I have made excuses for him.  My feelings are hurt and I do not have a person to talk to about this.  

Massive, huge, life-changing impact.  Attachment.  Security.  Love.  Such deep, complex, miraculous love.  Betrayal.  Hurt.  Disappointments.  Want.  Crying.  So much crying.  

He hurts me.  He doesn’t hold me.  

We are swimming through competing narratives all the time.  Contradictory stories.  Depending on your audience, you may choose to emphasize or de-emphasize pieces.  Or ommit details.

Over time, as you grow and change and your values or insights change, the narrative changes.

Our story is how we see it.  But we can get stuck in a loop.

We can give our story meaning, redemption.

(More to come later)