Impending Doom

Life blows.

Friday is my last day of employment, as I’m being laid off. Considering I really don’t want to go back to fast food, as it just sucks ass in every way possible, nor factory work, as my co-workers are really the only ones who made RCI/ADC bearable, that doesn’t leave me much else. Undoubtedly, when I do manage to find another job, it will be something loathesome.

Dammit, I need to find some way to clean this keyboard, all the keys are sticky due to spilling some lemonade on it.

My car is more unpredictable than ever, so it would make sense to get a new one, but of course that requires money, and not spending said money on video game stuff. Dammit.

I have yet to get anything tax-related from my 3 non-asshole-vaccum-place employers, which concerns me, since I’m new to the whole tax thing and it’s kind of freaking me out.

PS2 is going to have to be sent in again to fix Disc Read Error problem, I feel bad for slacking off so much at work lately, have yet to even play my XBOX, since first it had no power cord and now Justin is borrowing it while we try to find a new power supply for it, mom still has no job, but we still have no bills…etc. etc…Life blows.

Of course, there are various positive things that could be intertwined with the cloud of negativity as to not make things seem so bad, but what point is there in dwelling on beneficial things? Pshh, as if that ever helped anyone. Eight months after graduating high school, I haven’t made any gains. Some minor material possessions, but I’ve only replaced the money I spent, not saved up much more, and have job experience that is weak at best. I have made several good friends, which is awesome, but that doesn’t help me in my own life, and it wouldn’t surprise me if I end up losing touch with them when their lives surpass mine, as has happened many times in the past… Suffice to say, I’m not a damn bit further in life in any aspect than when I graduated, and that is incredibly frustrating. Perhaps I’ve went backwards, I rarely find the motivation to fulfill the various responsibilities that I have as a friend to whoever, aside from playing video games at *insert one of several friends names here*’s house, or to pursue one of the two things that occupy most of my mental time. It’s pathetic. When things are going bad, it’s like being stuck in quicksand, it just seems to get worse and worse and it’s hard to find the will to get out, but, when things weren’t so bad…what did I ever do to prevent it from happening again? Seems like I can’t think of an answer to that.

Enough of this pointless pessimism! I hate putting my thoughts down like this, it seems so trivial and stupid in retrospect, and feels attention whore-ish, perhaps moreso because I often neglect my various journals/blogs/whatever.