How Much Is That Dress In The Window?

When you’re driving past the dress boutique, like I do every morning, you never know what you are going to find.  Consider this week’s window display:

Observe the diverse offerings here: the dark maroon number on the left is created from countless tiny knife pleats in the chiffon.  Swank!  The extravaganza of giant bows on the one in the middle looks like it was made with Ellie May Clampett in mind.  On second thought, maybe not — I could see Ellie May in the giant shoulder bow, but Granny probably would not let her get away with that one at ground zero.  But our focus here cannot be anything else except the beaded bodice on the right side of the window.

I’m guessing that the theme of this window is "I am Woman".  Not content with letting the dresses speak to that fact by themselves, notice the enhancements we see here.  The crystal pin in the cleavage of the dark maroon dress draws the eye from the boob crack on down.  The big bow of the ruffled dress brings attention back to the how-do-you-say Venus area.  And then there are those beads.

I don’t know quite what to make of it.  Check out the pirate patches under the swags of beads.

I’ve inspected this very closely and cannot figure out what that is about.  Is it part of the bodice for modesty’s sake?  If so, a blinking neon sign would be more subtle.  Is it just me, or do the black triangles call attention to that very area?  If the dress is meant to work without the patches — for they don’t seem to be attached in any way — are these things added on for the sake of the dummy’s dignity?

Who knows?  Perhaps they were trying to prevent the public from becoming overly excited by a peek at artificial and not-too-realistic boobies.

Oh, on another note.  Remind me to tell you about the mysterious appearance of two all white pigeons at my house.