your fins, my feet

Is this you into which I’ve fallen?
Hold the sharks at bay, for I’d dearly love to stay awhile:
drag me way out with your currents, subtle yet unrelenting;
sink me with your whirlpools, quiet in their tender violence;
prick me with the urchins floating errant in your tide;
placate me with the minnow gliding silently astride me;
lose me in the brightest-colored corals of your reef;
lose me also in the depths of your darkest trench uncharted;
lessen me alongside the blue whale’s endless flank;
terrify me with the blackness of this, your blue sea;
and when I’m out of breath, end my time in your world grandly –
let the circling sharks feast on my numb limbs,
have the marlin find my lungs, and the stingray’s barb, my heart –
then drown me with a tidal wave so perfect it is welcome.

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May 24, 2007

this reminded me of pablo neruda

Oh, I’m swooning. What a lovely poem (though dark like that sea).

May 27, 2007

help me with metaphors. you’re an expert at them. any tips on how to evoke emotions through effective metaphors? im no good at them. im jealous of your writing.

I have used the sea, or water in general, far to often in my depictions of melancholy. It is refreshing to see it used with distinctly different vocabulary and shades of different meanings.