I just want to live and love

I just want to live and love
I’m the ghost
You never see
The beauty
You’ll never uncover
Hiding in the shadows
Because it is the only place
I can hide
So you don’t see my demise

You had everyone against me
Spreading lies
The pain you caused
Felt like a thousand knives
Carving out pieces of flesh
You did not let me rest
As my blood
Leaked from my chest

You are the reason
I rip my eyes out
Every goddamn night
When I sleep
All I see
Is the false conspiracy
Tattooed inside my head
The trauma that haunts me
As I try to dream
It surfaces
And devours me

When I awake
Convulsions overtake me
Puking my guts out
Repeating the process
Day and night
Tears become
My lonely friend
And suicide
Manifest thoughts inside my head

I am nothing
For you have destroyed and raped
All my feelings inside
My soul still survives
Try and destroy me again
Rip my flesh off
Cut me open
I only have
So much I can bleed
Before my heart gives out
And death overtakes me

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December 3, 2019

NO ONE is worth feelings that strong but yourself.

December 4, 2019


Even though it is part of the story of my character, I wrote it when I was having my worst PTSD symptoms.  I ended up finding out that writing poetry was my therapy.

December 4, 2019

@raphaeltiriel – Don’t get me wrong, I really like it… I just always feel the need to link someone’s writing to them, whether it is or not actually linked  lol.

December 5, 2019


I wasn’t saying you didn’t like it.  I was just giving the background to the creation of the poem.  Thanks!

December 3, 2019

Self worth is always the hardest.

December 4, 2019


Oh man, that used to be so hard for me.  I spent a good ten years of my life feeling completely worthless and I just wanted to die.