Rich and Colourful

So I ponder on what it means to create a "rich and colourful" life… A creative life.. A stimulating life… An exquisitely delicious life…

The word thtat remained in my head was the word "creative"…

There are so many descriptions and explnations of what "creative" means… Imight not be able to paint the best piece of art on cavas, but I can write a song….  And Imight not know how to come up with a wild and fantastic look with fashion accessories and crazy hairstyle… but it all goes into the decoration of my home…

What would it mean to create a creative life… What woul dit mean TO ME…?

 

To be honest it’s usually strange and exciting movies that throw me into this wild frenzy of thought… And that’s why I love those kinds of movies… Movies where the characters are rich and spontaenous…. Where the characters are FULLL….

These movies include "Endless Sunshine of the Spotless Mind", "Vicky Christina Barcelona", "Frida", "Amelie", "Yes Man"… "Travelling Light", even "School of Rock" LOL…

 

Is it silly that i am inspired by movies, where these characters really ARE just characters…? Or have these movies accomplished what they are MEANT to accomplish – that is to inspire and provoke thought.. and questioning…?

 

Clementine in "Endless Sunshine" inspires me because she lives a full life… She is totally and completely herself – with her blue hair and then her tangerine hair… and her many colourful costumes.. She is always wearing bright blues and reds… complimenting her BEAUTIFUL features… (because Kate Winslet is just amazingly beautiful…) … And Clementine dresses up in Japanese clothing because they go out for dinner to a Japanese restaurant… How fucking cool is that? lol. And she has rich and colourful drapes all over her home.. covering sofas and beds and windows… And she just LIVES…

Sadly this leads to the end of their relationship because… because he is the complete opposite.. and he eventually gets tired of it all…

But that hunger for living life the way she does…. Is that achievale in real life? I really want it to be acheiveable in real life… She inspires me to be …. like THAT…

Christina in "Vicky Christina.." (if that is Scarlet Johanssen’s character)… inspires me because she is so beautifully sensual…. (Scarlet is beautifully sensual herself…) and Christina just lives life… No questions asked… They’re in Spain and some sexy stranger asks them to join him on a trip out to the country… And Christina jumps at the chance. Vicky is more constrained. Somehow they end up travelling with this perfect stranger… and Christina gets sexually entangled with him… Then his ex (or not so EX) appears.. and all 3 end up having a relationship TOGETHER… The perfect stranger and his ex-not-so-ex are painting artists…. And the movie is filled with this artistic expression of emotion…. Eventually Christina realises that this is just a passing thing for her – that she needs to go back home… Back to her normal life, I suppose….. She hurts the couple… They are both VERY VERY hurt… They both love her… She brings peace and tranquility to their crazy and dangerous relationship… But Christina must go.

I lived that spontaneous life when I was much younger… It caused a lot of trouble, but I’ve always put it down to the fact that I was young, and stupid… and possibly didn’t SEE potential danger…

 

I don’t know. I don’t know what it is that I seek… I don’t know what it is that I feel is MISSING from my life…

And it’s not something that I’m thinking about NOW … it is something that comes and goes throughout my life, but this missing puzzle has been missing for awhile…

 

Sometimes I think that I should just take Life by its horns and hurl it my way… and really truly go out of my way to CREATE this creative, rich, fulfilling life that I seek….

But I fear that it will become just like any other project I start…… and never finish.

I might make a list of what it means to ME to have a rich and creative life… I could make that list right here right now….

But it is very possible that the list … will stay a list….

 

 

Frida inspires me because she is just HERSELF. She doesn’t care what her family says.. if she wants to wear a man’s suit, she wear’s a man’s suit… If she wants to have an affair with a woman later in her marriage years, she goes ahead and has an affair with a woman… She hurts all the same because her husband is – an artist – who paints women nude… and ends up having affairs with all of them… Frida screams and shouts and longs from the depths of her heart for his loyalty…. And never gains it.. But she loves him, and is with him till the end.

 

It’s his girlfriend in "Yes Man" who inspires me.. She is an artist… She is a  hobby photographer and yoga instructor by day… And a rock chick by night… But it’s not this… It’s the fact that she doesn’t actually get PAID for these activities… They are activities she indulges in because they are her PASSIONS.. And she doesn’t care to make a dime out of them because… because she is just HAPPY. And that’s all that matters to her.

Of course, this is unrealistic. The point isn’t to suddenly forget about an income… But the point is to see that maybe… we could ALL indulge in something we LOVE just for the sake of loving it… and being HAPPY.

 

I need to think about the odd little things that bring me joy.

I need to indulge in these….

 

These thoughts are not exhaustive………

But I must stop writing now.

 

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March 20, 2010