my last few weeks

I don’t know what is going on with these kids. It’s hard working with kids especially ones who have learning disabilities and ADHD but also the ones who have shitty home lives. I have one Jayquan he’s always kinda smelly but that could be because he doesn’t like to take baths. He has different clothes on every day so I don’t think it’s neglect. We have two that are cousins one Izic I’ve known since kindergarten. His mom had him when she was 14 and I still don’t think she has her stuff together but she has a job and is going to school so I guess it’s better than it has been. I know Izic came to me last year and told me that mom’s bf was mean to her and would yell at her. I asked him if he put his hands on her or him he said no. Mom was pregnant at the time. He told me that he was terrified to go to sleep because he was afraid the bf would kill them in their sleep. What do you say to that? My heart was broken for him. I think things have gotten better. Antonio I just met this year. His stepdad was beaten to death with a bat and metal pipe. I’m sure its super hard on mom because Antonio usually doesn’t show up until like 930. They claim that it’s because of Antonio’s younger sisters but I don’t know. He recently said to me that they don’t have much food in the house so I got him in a program we have at school called bookbag buddies where they rent bookbags and get them filled every Thursday with food. Leiajha is my bigger girl who has a LOT of issues. Her mom is currently in Texas looking for work and a house. They are supposed to be moving in March. She has a history of lying, mental issues and she’s been in juvie. She has good moments but unfortunately the bad outweigh the good. Contrell I’ve known for 3 years. When he first came to us dad had just gotten out of jail and mom abandoned him and was into drugs and such and grandma had custody. When grandma had him he was medicated, on time and at school and his behavior was improving. Grandma wanted to give him a chance at raising him so she let dad take over but I think grandma is regretting that decision because dad won’t even put her as a emergency contact for Contrell. He NEEDS medication and dad claims that he can’t get it which I don’t believe. Dad doesn’t seem to realize that all this letting Contrell stay home just because is gonna catch up to him in the future. Middle school is much faster paced than grade school and unfortunately Contrell will just get lost in the shuffle if he doesn’t start being at school. Its sad because Contrell is a kind, loving kid who is smart but I think all these days off just because isn’t helping him. Last school year he was gone for a total of 60 days and this year so far he’s at 35 for being absent and like 25 for tardy. That’s a issue. Davontay is our other tall kid. He has a lot of issues with impulsivity touching, saying things to others. Just basically trying to instigate things. We heard from the other kids that he was much worse last year than this year. Jimmy I’ve known for 3 years as well. This poor kid has a rough life. Dad has been in and out of jail. Mom is a lower IQ like Jimmy is. His little sister got hit by a car and the person took off of a few years ago. Thankfully she recovered. Mom just had  a baby this past year. This poor kid just doesn’t know how to deal with his emotions and then he has meltdowns. One meltdown he called me a fucking bitch, a fucking whore and told me to get my fucking hands off of him(which I didn’t have on him) I was blocking a door so he could calm down. In the 3 years I’ve known him he has NEVER swore at me no matter how angry he has gotten. I truly feel bad for him. Shomaria is lower IQ like Jimmy. Her and Leiajha had a lot of issues last school year at their past school. Things have gotten better between them but it seems some of the regular general ed girls like to pick on her. Her aunt tells her to not take any shit and fight them but mom doesn’t want her to do that. I guess the aunt threatened the principal one day. That’s why I love doing what I do because if I can bring some happiness to their day or make them forget something for a little while I’m for it. Even just be someone they can go to it’s worth it. They can call me whatever names they want to. I don’t let their words bother me because I understand some of them don’t mean what they are saying.

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