Yes, I am a wicked person…

While in Sirmione, a lovely village on a peninsula jutting into the southern end of Lago di Garda, there was a legless amputee put into place by the local Roma (gypsies) to beg passerby for alms.  His mantra was, “Dammi una mano”, which is basically, “Give me a hand”.

My reply was, “Sono le gambe di cui avrai bisogno, amico, non una mano”, to the effect of, “It’s legs you’ll be wanting, mate, not a hand.”

So, see you all in Hell.

In other news, walking in Midtown during lunch today, I heard a man say to his son, “What are you doing with all that food?  You eat like you have 10 assholes!”

How’s that for imagery?