my mind is running in quadruple time

New ticker!!!

Woohoo! My reproductive organs are working! (Mommy, are you prepped for the birds and the bees talk?) I’m 18 weeks old, only 154 days to go!

1. 154 days seems like a long damn time!

2. My oldest is going to be 11 this year and I still dont’ want to talk about him and any birds, bees, giraffes, sasquatches, ANY OF IT. Blah!!! I know I have to eventually, but BLAAAAAAAH!

3. I’m feeling fat, wavering between wanting to hide my belly and show it off because there IS a baby in there somewhere!

4. This moving business is freaking me out. Like I’m getting REALLY NERVOUS. Moving costs a buttload of money damn it! We are trying to get our utilities set up and all those start fees are building up like crazy.

AND THEN… we have to try and get our appliances, but I think it’ll work.

As much as I don’t want to, I do have 800 bucks in Best Buy Credit. Add a couple hundree more and we can get a decent energy efficient fridge (as it stands now, the one we use probably sucks up 150 to 200 bucks in electricity per month, because it’s old and stupid and we just aren’t going to pay that if we don’t have to!). At the end of the month when I get my second pay check, we can afford to get a washer. That means we will be hanging clothes to dry for a few weeks, but that never kills anyone does it? Might make the clothes a little stiff, but whatever. I might see if I can rig a clothesline in the backyard. Wouldn’t that be cute?!

But knowing my luck, my dogs will tear all the clothes down and I’ll want to murder them. Maybe I won’t do that. lol.

Then when I get my first paycheck in April we’ll get the dryer and we’ll be set.

We’ll be saving most, if not all, of my money after that. We will only spend what we need to get baby stuff. So far, I want this:

*Baby Co Sleeper Bassinette Contraption (I don’t know which yet,I’m wavering between two kinds)

*Car seat and stroller combo (I loved the one I had before and so I want another like that)

*Moby Wrap

*Baby clothes and diapers, blankets, spit up clothes and all that

*Breast Pump (So I can pump some milk so Baboo can help feed sometimes. We can always get this a little after the baby is born if we don’t have the money for it now.)

That’s about all I’m gonna worry with at first. I know that I will have a small shower (I want to have one online!! Like I did for my Bachelorette Picture Burning party lol) but I dont’ really KNOW a lot of people. I think if the people from my job  throw me one (which I’m sure they will, a lot of them are so excited) then I will just have my mom and sisters. LOL, that’s not a shower. so whatever. I think I just want to see if people will get me things to help so i know what else I have to buy. If nobody gets me shit, then I know I have to buy everything. lol.

No big.

See what happens when you’re anti social?

See how much I care.

So that’s how my head is this morning.

I’m going crazy, making lists, freaking out.

I have to take a few days off work near the end of the month and I’m tapped out (On purpose, I really want to resign with little to no time left in my sick and vacation banks. I want to clean them OUT, use it alllll) so I may have to take a day or so without pay. It shouldn’t be too detrimental. blaaah.

I’m going to try and be REALLY GOOD In April and May. No getting sick Monique!

I have to work on my "manual" so that whoever has to do my shit knows what to do. It is going to suck a little to leave here when this section is so short staffed, BUT, they are already kililng this section anyway (as in transferring everyone somewhere else) so I can’t get too upset about it. They’ll make it work, I have my family as my priority now.

I love my husband so much for working to get us to this point. I mean, he didn’t have to, but as soon as it was needed, he stepped up.

He can be a pain in my butt, but he’s so awesome too.

Anyway, I should go do some work and slowly but surely start cleanign things up. I don’t want to do it all at once, I’m not telling anyone I’m resigning yet. I want to wait until a week or so before I turn in my letter. I keep thinking something terrible will happen and I’ll end up having to stay. lol. NOOOOO. lol.

I can’t think like that though. we have very solid plans, firm foundation. We’ll be ok. But there is always a plan B. I plan on applying for a promotinal exam (that I think I can do pretty well on!) and just getting on the hiring list before I go. If something terrible happens, I’ll at least be on a list, and as long as I do well we can only hope that it will be a viable option for later on.

I don’t know! We’ll see!

I’m allll over the place.

wth.

let me shut up.

ok, i’m leaving.

for now.

muahahahaaha.

loveyoupeople! *muah!*

Oh yeah, I have a ticker. Look at that!

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        Humanity Scar   

 (A zombie apocalypse survival diary, for your reading pleasure and future knowledge when they take over the world. Yes, I am the author.)