09/13/2009

i did so well today, kept busy, kept moving.  what a face i had on.  what a marvelous face.

and then darkness descends and it comes apart and the tears come stubbornly, ignoring my refusals.  the memories of that night flood my mind.  i sit on the edge of my bed, eyes glazed over, the image of the light blue socks on my newly dead sisters feet fill every piece of my brain. 

i sit here sobbing alone on a salt and tears sunday.

you’d think after six years i’d get better at this.  you’d think.