Filling The Void, Social Edition

Recently I transcribed my creative writing journal written in 2000-2006 and it helped me realize something: I was obsessed with finding the “one.” I totally treated my friendships as non-existent. I didn’t want to go on living because I had no girlfriend. Being 37 nearly 38 years old and seeing my younger self agonizing over… well, the same things I’m agonizing over now is jarring. It’s actually an exacerbated problem now because I don’t have the 5, 6 friends and one really great co-worker friendship instead of several. How do I fix this?

I’ve arrived that I need to expand my horizons. I’m active in a Facebook group dedicated to one MBTI system. It’s only one facet of my personality; a singular interest for someone as dynamic as myself. I’m also actively fathering my daughter almost every weekend. I’ve re-established relationships with my mom, sister, and long-time friend. I suppose this will fill more of a void after moving back to an area that’s closer to where they reside. However, a key component of my life before getting into my 14-year relationship was an online journal community. Other than chat rooms of the era and my job it was an avenue to expand my horizons, perspective to be more aware of the spectrum of life experiences.

I dabbled back in March, April of last year so I hope to make this go ’round a little more permanent. It might be the last part of my identity solidify itself once more in my new life. At that time last year so much was unknown and now things have settled down quite a bit. In theory, it should work.