what do fat people wear?

All my life I have been tall, and not small. I have been reasonably slender, sort of, and my height has hidden the fact that I am not as slim as I looked. Every year I put on more and more weight. Now I am at a point where I really don’t know what to wear.

I finally found some jeans that work for me, and I did manage to get a couple pr of capris and some shorts. None of them look great, but they aren’t bad. I mostly wear tshirts, and I bought some knit Henley type t shirts in XL that work ok, except most of them are a little on the short side and I can’t hide my fat middle. Dresses… I don’t know. I have some bag type dresses that have jackets that go over so they look less bag like, and I have one skirt with elastic waist that I can wear a tshirt type top with. I don’t wear button front shirts as they pull and look awful. My arms look terrible when I wear sleeveless now.

I have difficulty motivating myself to walk or go to the Y. I did that faithfully for a year and it made very little difference in my body, except I had a much better attitude and I didn’t gain as much. What do I do? I am not making a very graceful transition from young and looking ok, to I can’t believe that is me when I look in the mirror.

Plus I have issues w depression. My insurance coverage changed and it does not pay at all for antidepressants, which I have been on for almost 15 years. I need them now more than ever and I can’t afford them. This and the lack of working out don’t help with that. All I want to do is eat, and that is exactly the problem. I am out of control. I don’t know how to change directions.

faith hope and love, but the greatest of these is love.