That’s What Family’s For

     My grandmother just called me.  She basically gave me a much needed chewing out for the way I’ve been dealing with this break up.  We’re very close and once she found out from my mom that I was single again, she called me up to save me from the depressed funk that she knows I go into when a serious relationship of mine ends.  She’s Mexican and goes into that Latina attitude vibe when she gets preachy.  She reminded me several times that I come from very strong women, which is very true, and that I should have more self respect right now.  She asked me if we were still hanging out together and I told her that we were.  She grilled me on whether it was him doing the asking or if it was me.  I confessed that it was pretty much equal, but she wasn’t having any of that.  She told me to keep reminding myself that it was him who called this off, and that I have to be strong enough to just give him that time and space that he wants so badly.  That I need to keep it together and occupy myself with anything but thoughts of him and/or us.  If he wants to talk or hang out then that’s fine, just as long as he’s the one doing the asking and not the other way around.  I need to keep my head up high, and if he truly does love me then he’ll realize it and come back or if he doesn’t then that’s fine too.  It has to be.  I have no choice.

     It was a great kick in the pants, and I only pray that its effective enough to keep me from just accepting the scraps he continues to throw my way.  Well, if this whole thing doesn’t kill me in the end it’ll only make me a little crazier than I already was. 


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September 30, 2007

good grammy. she sounds cute. i would suggest not to hang out w/ him at all even if he calls the shots. he wanted his time and space and now he doens’t? that doesnt make sense. you gotta know what he wants and take it ya know? be like you either want me or you don’t we can do those seesaw thing.