lying eyes

the rhythm of the late october thunderstorm seals the cracks in my  tattered soul…

the rain falling with the sound of someone walking thru piles of dried leaves…

the ice blue flashes of lightening turning night into days for split seconds in time, taking snapshots of the hidden world of midnight…

the rolling thunder passing over head like a locomotive shunting, rumbling and softened almost into melody in the distance…

the world weeps for me tonight so can set in the doorway cuddling my Hershal and breathing in the fresh autumn air and exhaling some of the toxicity that is my life…

my ghosts gather around me, my wife, my jasper, my father, mother mother in law… and my father in law…

the dont say anything, they just stand behind me, watching the rain and watching over me…

i find my place in the rain, my groove if you will and the tears begin to flow…

not because of the storm, but in concert…

the rain falls on my skin, cold sharp, needles on my nerve ends..

everything is in balance…

i feel the storm, merge with it the feet of my soul begin to shuffle and then dance…

my face curls into a scream…

jaws part…

everything chokes in my throat…

i tremble, i quake under the pressure of a need that will not come…

thunder claps…

lightening flashes…

when i cannot bare the unresolved need to scream a single word on the very tips of my ears drift softly inexorably…

like a puff of smoke from my cigarette in the wind…

why…