*SIGH* It’s so ANYHOW

 

 

Its been 10 days since my last entry.

My heart still hurts and I feel alone…and.

And a new feeling… hopeless.

I don’t want to be a widow… I don’t want to date or remarry or be a no man wanting older woman smoking a pipe or chewing tobacco.

my heart hurts… I’m overwhelmed with memories of HIS/ OUR end and hopeless and alone

Who would’ve ever saw this coming?

Unbelievable… but its so anyhow.

 

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July 18, 2020

omg I missed the boat. I don’t need a man but I also don’t smoke a pipe or chew tobacco. I did not get the memo! Hug hold on. Life keeps moving and there is healing.

July 18, 2020

@snarkle I didn’t mean to imply that a woman without a man turns into one… I guess I really meant the loss of feeling feminine which is how I’ve been feeling. Thanks for the encouragement I am in unfamiliar territory emotionally.

July 18, 2020

@mymostself1 I was teasing very gently. Sorry it missed the mark. I make dolls. I have my autistic son that I raise. I write romance novels. I’ve been alone for 13 yrs. You don’t have to have a man to feel feminine. I promise.

July 18, 2020

@snarkle I know you were teasing… had to examine what I really meant though. Your life sounds full. Maybe someday.  I am raw knowing and hoping these feelings will pass. I just need time. Thanks for your kindness.

July 18, 2020

@mymostself1 I’ve seen so many people lost when their spouse dies. It’s so hard. Give yourself time to grieve. However long that takes. Try to remember that humor is still available and laughter helps. I struggle with multiple sclerosis and all the joy that brings. I am alone because my husband left me. Yours did not choose to go. He left because he had no choice. I hope that brings comfort to you. My life is full because I find it keeps my mind of things that would devastate me.

July 18, 2020

🤗

July 19, 2020

I’m so very sorry for your loss.  Now you are having to navigate new waters and it’s not easy.