After (Series)…almost my biography

A few days ago…well on Friday; I started reading this new book on my Kindle…I started reading ‘After’ by Anna Todd.

I find the main characters so irritating…to me Tessa is such a ‘push over’. It irritates me how she does things just to shut everyone up or to prove them wrong…I mean there is nothing wrong with being set in your own ways and being determined and to stand up for what you want and believe…but how she goes against her own judgement and character just to fit in or be like everyone else is just so degrading…degrading as a person and what we want all women to feel. She irritates me further by how much she tolerates the bad things that Hardin says to her, especially when he is drunk…and I don’t understand how she just continues to accept his apologies and then takes him back.

The funny thing out of all of this is how this story relates to me…how Tessa and Hardin are me and my husband. Okay so the story line isn’t 100% me and my husband, because Hardin has done some real awful things to her and to other girls…but when it comes to how angry he is particularly when he has been drinking; makes me almost picture my husband.

Hardin threatens other guys that so much as look at Tessa…my husband hasn’t done that but he has often said that if I cheated on him he would hunt the other guy down, kill him and after kicking me out of our home he would just climb into bed. I do get shocked when he tells me that…but for some odd reason I put up with it and I stay. I put up with him and love him. In my head I’ve created a fantasy life with him. But while I am reading ‘After’, I find myself getting so irritated at Tessa and I find myself begging her to leave him….is this me talking to myself?

But I love him…and I don’t see myself living my life without him…

love and life are tough!

Well I am on the 2nd book now…I am finding it hard to put down…once I am done reading the 1st 3 books in the series I am going to try and watch the movies…

…I do hope that this book does have a happy ending.

You know, while I am reading I often wish that Tessa gets into an accident or something, that will make Hardin feel bad and become a better person. I know it is wrong to think that way…I personally think that way for myself too sometimes. I thought that when I went into the clinic early this year, after my emotional break down, he would change and our relationship would become better. And it did for while…