Be Still my Heart…

While trying to be diplomatic, yesterday I made a decision. A decision I know my family will not be very supportive of, but if I want my family to take me seriously, and if I want to live my own life…make my own mistakes and learn, then I feel like I have to stand strong and do this.

Of course there are a few legal issues that may prohibit this, but I don’t think my father would go against me entirely.

I have always been known to lead with my heart…I’d like to think that I am brave and everyone knows that I have a strong shield around my heart. But a huge decision lies in front of me and I need to make the right one.

What kind of wife would I be if I didn’t stand up and for my husband?

What kind of adult would I be if I just bowed down to what my father said?

Yesterday I spoke with my husband and he assured me that he will play his part and do what he has to do. If I intend to continue to live my life by his side, I need to trust him and what he says. Furthermore I need to be there for him. So I am going to do it. I am going to buy that property for him and then obviously have him buy it back from me, via a bond. I am going to give him the chance to make something of himself and do something for himself and me.

How can I want and expect more from him, if I won’t give him a chance to get there? To be able to be what he aspires to be and can be…

While driving to work I considered making an agreement with him that I will do all this if he promises not to drink…but I realize that I cannot keep making those agreements with him, he has to learn it himself and come to that point himself. Hopefully with this chance and with all these responsibilities he will come to that point.