Recent Entries

• Follow up to the last post…

  April 21, 2024

  He just called apologizing. Last night it was 100% my fault, this morning was still 100% my fault, but right now he called apologizing for the way he reacted and the things he said, and said he “hates being like that”…. So right now, at 11:30, I’m in bed and sobbing all over again because…

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• Complete 180

  April 21, 2024

  I guess the universe didn’t think I was ready to be happy. I saw a complete different side of him last night. It was ugly. He said some UGLY things. I’m actually mildly afraid of him.  I’m afraid of doing something wrong. I woke up in a complete panic and it hasn’t gone away. He…

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• So much to love

  April 18, 2024

  Right after my last post I on here I called around and found myself a new therapist. I didn’t do my last session with my previous one like I planned, because I felt like there wasn’t much that could be accomplished in one session and I didn’t want to spend the $140 out of pocket…

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• Gushing a little 💗

  April 3, 2024

  Effective Monday, I have new insurance. So also effective Monday, I need to find a new therapist. I briefly considered giving myself a break from therapy because I’ve been doing so well, but I think that with me starting a brand new relationship and with all of the things I have going on right no...

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• Trying to come down from this high

  March 17, 2024

  I finally went on a date with this guy last night and I am pretty sure we pretty much fell in love lmfao. We have “known” each other for years. He’s a friend of my ex, sorta. They went to school together and they kept in touch on the socials but aren’t FRIEND-friends. So during…

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• Love bombing

  March 10, 2024

  Something I found out about myself after a relationship a little while back is that I have a tendency to love bomb in the beginning of some of my relationships. The ones I’m most excited about. I don’t do it in all of them. Some people do this as a manipulation tactic. Then others do…

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• Happy

  March 8, 2024

  Remember when I was dating the dude who robbed his family last summer, but I didn’t wanna be serious with him bc I was kinda sweating another guy too? Well, the other guy, shy as he is, asked me out finally. We don’t have definitive plans yet, we are kinda doing the flirty dance with…

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• Okay then

  February 1, 2024

  Been on a few dates with this dude who is already more into me than I am into him. The dude who lives about an hour away. That one. when I say a few dates I mean 3. 3 dates and he picked a fight with me for some reason I cannot figure out. We…

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• Trauma Queen pt 2

  January 19, 2024

  These dreams haunted me all day, they were so vivid. I wish I could go somewhere to get out of my head but there’s no running from my brain. I’m hoping tomorrow is so much better. I have another date with a guy I met online. He’s super nice. Kind of a dork. But I’m…

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