Walking through this life, picking my Self up when I stumble, learning and growing each time. Sharing this path with others, sometimes holding hands for awhile, then saying good bye as we choose different ways. Always remembering by writing a map of my journey.

Latest Entry

Evenings are …

November 13, 2019
… the toughest part of my day, unless I'm distracted with external activities like classes, workshops, meetings, the gym, etc.  Not really sure why that is or when it became that way, but while I sat in the dark last night icing and heating my ankle, I figured out it's been decades.  Getting high...
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Recent Entries

  • It’s unusual to …
    November 11, 2019
    … journal in the evenings, but tonight is different.  I've had a bit of a breakthrough that I want to capture while it still feels good.  This morning I did the 11:11 exercise in manifesting, which basically is writing out what I want in my life.  Pretty cool that I finished and put my pencil&hel...
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  • Spent the morning …
    November 11, 2019
    … on the couch yesterday meditating, dozing, dreaming.  I was tired from the weird day on Saturday, plus being up in the night with pain, so it was exactly what I needed and I didn't once berate myself.  I dreamt that Dennis was alive and he had just gone on a trip.  He left so…
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  • Peter is down for …
    November 10, 2019
    … the weekend with Jesse and Kim.  He doesn't look well at all.  His skin is gray and he's lost weight since I saw him only a month or so ago.  I'm so glad he came down so that he could see everyone.  It's so cute to see how his great-grandkids love him to pieces,…
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  • Highlights and updates …
    November 9, 2019
    … from the recent past:  my SheShed has been assembled; I will be cutting the rafters today so Jason can put on the roof for me hopefully within the next week or two; I'll have to ask him if I can put up the outside walls before the roof or if I should wait until…
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  • Some life-changing …
    November 8, 2019
    … decisions need to be made.  Decisions I've been mulling over for almost a year.  Even getting sidetracked slightly with other things didn't stop me from contemplating, weighing the pros and cons, allowing total insecurity to envelop me and then seeing it for what it truly is … fear … and unders...
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  • Interesting turn of …
    November 7, 2019
    … events lately.  John seems to be having a change of heart or something.  He's pulled back, blaming it on the weather which I totally get.  Nobody likes shorter days, cold mornings and gray skies, but hey, deal with it! Maybe he just can't and I should be more understanding, but that's not easy ...
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  • Truth? I feel very …
    November 1, 2019
    … much like a bitch lately.  No time for complaining or whining.  No patience for other people.  Seclusion and isolation is best, otherwise I just might punch you in the throat.  Am I looking for reasons behind this mood? Nope! Writing has been minimal because the dark side of me is prevalent.  A...
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  • Grief quietly made …
    October 25, 2019
    … an appearance yesterday.  My co-worker went to the lunchroom and I heard a crash and a bang, and my heart stopped until I heard the microwave door open and knew that everything was okay.  I didn't hear Dennis fall in the kitchen.  I didn't hear a crash or a bang.  Not that it would…
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  • There continues to be …
    October 23, 2019
    … some residual gleanings from telling John I was babysitting on Sunday when I really wasn't.  In no particular order ...  it's okay to tell my truth  BJ's actions can also be used to determine when I've gone against my truth, either with words or actions  I don't trust that people will like/acce...
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