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My working man

March 10, 2023
He says he's doing okay. He say's the 12 hour shifts and being away from home gets a little easier day by day. He says he's doing okay... But he looks so tired. He say's he's doing okay, only getting 4-5 hours of sleep. He say's he's doing okay, but has nightmares every night when…
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Recent Entries

  • Therapy
    March 1, 2023
    I had a good therapy session today. She had me write a letter to my younger self and read it out loud. She also asked me a question that I've never thought of before. "Why are you able to set boundaries with your dad, but when it comes to your mom you accept her for…
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  • Asset 5
    Searching For Sunshine
    February 23, 2023
    I've been trying to make sense of the pain I feel. I pinch myself sometimes because this shit don't feel real. I'm numb from my head, down to my toes. My heart still beats inside but with a different tone.   Sometimes this all feels like I'm stuck here trapped inside my mind. Look into…
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  • Night #1 without him
    February 21, 2023
    He left at 5am, I've been up ever sense. I kept myself as busy as I could today but even so I had moments of extreme sadness. Something as stupid as finding a claw clip of mine that he wears sent me to tears. So I shoved it in a drawer, got back up and…
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  • Alone
    February 20, 2023
    He left for work today and won't be home for 3 months. I wonder how loud the silence will be.
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  • Asset 5
    Long Distance
    February 19, 2023
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  • Shrek
    February 18, 2023
    It's 2 am and we just watched Shrek(2). Our cat knocked over an entire glass of water. You cleaned it up, I watched. I watched the whole movie watching you. Soaking up the moments. Trying to press record in my brain for when you're gone. I know I have big day tomorrow and I should…
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  • Sink or Swim
    February 17, 2023
    2/17 Friday Why does everything feel so heavy? It's not even that deep. He's going away to make money, but he'll come back for me... Right? And when he's gone, I'll finally have my "Emily in Paris" moment that I've wanted for so long. Right? I could move, I could record music, I could grow.…
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  • Who Would I Be If No-one Else Was Around?
    February 14, 2023
    "People Pleaser" I would be fearless. I would say no┬ámore often. I would tell people to go f*ck themselves, & take no guilt in the matter. I would hear my own opinions, & act on them without hesitation. I would fall in love, & let others fall in love with me. I would find beauty…
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