Today has been good so far, except for my neuropathy. I’ll be sitting completely still playing a game on my phone or whatever, and all of a sudden my whole body will jerk. It’s really frustrating. I’m on Lyrica for it, but today it doesn’t seem to be helping. Either that or the neuropathy is getting worse. I’m on the maximum dosage of the Lyrica though, so I guess it’s just something I’ll have to deal with. It was just in my legs, but now it’s in my hands too. I have to be careful when I’m cooking or anything because I can’t tell how hot anything is. All I need on top of everything else is to burn myself. I’ve actually been wondering if that’s a symptom of MS. My doctor referred me a long time ago to get tests done to see if I have MS, but I missed the appointment and never rescheduled. She said that a lot of the symptoms I have sound like MS, and I’ve also been told the same thing by other doctors in the past. I don’t know if I’m just scared of the tests or if I just don’t want to hear that I have it. Maybe one day I’ll get the nerve to find out.
I’ve been thinking a lot about how I grew up. I know…this has zero to do with what I was talking about, but…I’m wanting to write my life story sometime. I don’t know why I want to do that, because all it would do is make me relive all the bad stuff I went through. It’s probably not a good idea. Maybe I’m just so bored I’m just looking for something to do. Who knows. My mind tends to race sometimes, and I’ll be thinking of several things at once. When that happens, I can’t seem to separate all the thoughts in my head. I guess maybe I’m going through a manic phase when that happens. I have bipolar disorder, so I could be coming up on a manic phase. God I hope not. I hate it when that happens. It makes me feel like I’m going crazy at times. I’m on Lamictal, Paxil, and Abilify and still I go through phases either of depression or mania. It really sucks to be this way.