A lot on my mind..

Hey every one.. i hope you guys are having a good day.. me on the other hand my day could be better.. honestly kinda disappointed in my self. i let my wall down for someone just for it to back fire in my face.. what i thought was going to be a normal day turns into my boyfriend of three years (well i guess now ex) kicking me out all because i was interested in his college stuff.. he was supposed to be in orientation but of course he wants paying attention to it just like the other people in the chat.. he was telling me what was going on in the chat and then he started typing.. i began to ask what was being said and honestly i regret even doing that. he told me they asked where he is from and i was like just you and he said no and the proceeded to blow up on me.. saying im insecure but honestly i was just curious and was seeing where everyone was from. he told me to leave the room but i tried explaining myself but just made the situation worse. He then called his mom and told her how im doing all of this and then told her how i didnt finish school but i havent finished because ive been dealing with mental illness.  I tried standing up for myself but it only caused for his mom to tell him when i go to work tomorrow im not allowed to return.. and my stuff will be on the curb.. but then she changes it and says my stuff will be okay.. honestly i dont trust that so i had to have someone cover my shift tomorrow.. my mom told me she doesnt want to be put in this anymore because every single time he gets mad he tells me to get out.. my dad doesnt want to be in it and my stepdad already yelled at me for going back to him before.. i feel so down and just alone. His mom told him to block me on social media because he didnt like what i posted but when i dont like what he post she tells me to ignore it.. i have a lot going on and i told her that but her family is more important… i told him my family doesnt really talk to me anymore because of this relationship so i dont have no where to go and his words were ” not my fault you have a shitty family you are grown figure it out” i just know if the rolls were reversed and this was my house no matter how mad i got i would never put someone out on the street especially not here in vegas.. everyone knows what they do to girls in vegas.. but he said he doesnt care what happens to me and my life isnt shit and thats why im working a basic job (i work at starbucks) and my life will never be anything.. and honestly im starting to believe it.. his mom comes back saturday she will probably drop me off at a womens shelter.. and ill have to figure it out from there.. probably will sell alot of my stuff to have extra money.. i dont know just feeling alone and lost and hurt…

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July 14, 2021

This guy and HIS family aren’t shit. THEY are the shitty family.