When do you give up?
Addiction is an ugly thing. It turns someone you have known since you were 13 into a complete stranger. It turns someone who is good and smart and kind into someone who manipulates and lies and says hurtful things. And you find yourself fighting for this person because you want to believe that the real them is still in there somewhere, but no matter what you do or say they keep stumbling backwards. They tell you they are grateful you’ve stuck around when no one else has. They tell you that they are getting better. They tell you anything to keep you believing in them so that they have your support. So that you’ll buy them food and clothing and help them get that job interview. They make a big leap forward and you see a glimmer of hope, only for them to fall back even further again and leave you disappointed. It’s a crazy up and down never ending roller coaster and I’m afraid to get off because if they lose their only friend left, they might do something stupid, but if I stay I’ll just get sucked dry and keep wasting my time and energy.
I know exactly what you mean about how drugs change a person. My brother is a recovering heroin addict. When using he was a totally different person. He stole from me and from many other people including my mom and dad. He always said things to try and keep us believing in him that he was getting better even when he wasn’t. Now he’s been clean for a little over a year and he’s doing awesome! He’s back to the great brother he was before drugs came into the picture.
@mamaqueenie518 I’m so happy to hear that he’s recovered! That seems almost like an impossible feat. You must be very grateful and proud. I’m talking about a good friend of mine. There are times when I just want to give up because nothing I do matters, but I just can’t.
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😐 I feel you on this one…. My sister has struggled with addiction for quite some time… It got even worse when we lost our father to cancer in 2014. Since then she lost her daughter ( My mother has custody now) and probably every friend/family member besides me…. I cant give up on her and wont… I have found that putting in all the effort and constantly texting and trying to rarely get a response is exhausting… So Ive held back a lot now. Ill text here and there and if i get a response, GREAT! but sometimes it’ll be months before i hear back from her. I tell her I love her often and if she calls or texts I ALWAYS answer… I saw her a couple weeks ago and its always nice…. I realize she will only get help or change when she is truly ready…. Until then I just love her for who she is and reach out to let her know that she is loved and accepted no matter her mistakes…
@gmaddi That’s hard. I’m so sorry you’re family is going through this and I’m sorry for your loss. I’m talking about a friend of mine I’ve has since childhood. He lost his wife and kids, job, house, his entire life to drugs and alcohol. He’s been in and out of prison, on and off the streets, can’t keep a job. The difference between him and your sister is that he is calling me and texting me constantly. He solely depends on me Because he has no one else. It’s unhealthy for him and for me and it’s begun to affect my energy and my life.
@hannah_banana0012 😥 You are in a super hard spot yourself!! I also cant imagine the pain he feels either with all of his losses because of the addiction.. It is really heart breaking in both positions….
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