Cupid, You’re Fired!

Dear Diary,

I am really enjoying the new job. Though it’s completely different from my last. With the last job I was constantly on my feet running around like a chicken with it’s head cut off. This job, I am sitting, way more than I’d like to. I feel like there are things I should be doing, but in reality, there isn’t. Don’t get me wrong though, I am learning quite a bit, and I am a little overwhelmed, but I think I am catching on and I am enjoying it so far. My new coworkers are great too! They are super helpful and don’t mind the newbie asking a gazillion questions. My boss is pretty cool as well. On Thursday, Valentine’s Day, he passed out Subway gift cards to the staff, which was pretty awesome. At least I cannot say I didn’t get anything for Valentine’s Day. Well, that wouldn’t have been true anyway because my sister bought me some chocolate and delivered it on Wednesday. I think it was more for comfort in the passing of my poor dog. It was just disguised in Valentine chocolate. Whatever though, chocolate is chocolate and I will eat it. 

You know, Diary, Valentine’s Day is a really crappy holiday. Like, I am happy for those happy couples in all, but it just reminds me how single I am. Like, in my everyday life I come off as if I don’t need a companion, like I am a single, independent female…blah, blah, blah…but I truly miss being with someone. It’s been over 2 damn years. Am I just that damn picky? Repulsive? What??? I mean, I know I don’t have the perfect body ( I like food, what can I say?) and I am not supermodel gorgeous, but I didn’t think I was too ugly either, and I thought I had a pretty good personality, but why the hell is it so hard to meet someone? Hell, I even put myself out there and nothing. I even revealed that I had feelings for someone recently, but was that ever a fucking mistake. Diary, I think it’s just hopeless. Why can’t I meet a decent guy that I can really click with? It’s so frustrating. I want to give up on this whole dating thing, but on the other hand, I am so sick of being surrounded by happy couples. All of my friends are in relationships and it’s always such a pain in the ass to go out with everyone only to be the odd one out…again….

I think I just depressed myself even more. It would be nice to come home to someone and talk about my day. And cook for more than one. And have someone to cuddle up to on these cold ass winter days. And someone to laugh with and cry with and watch movies with….here I go again. Sorry Diary.

Anway, I guess it’s just me and the cat. Have a good night.

Your Friend, 

That Girl