I have an assignment to do which needs to be handed in on the 30th of August. Now being the diligent student that I am; I started it a few weeks ago and just have 2 more questions to answer. They are each 20 mark questions each but shouldn’t take too long to answer them…anyway…in order for me to answer the 1st question I really need to pay attention to the morning Shul service. And this past Saturday I kinda did.
As like every other Shabat Shul service the congregation starts off with singing songs where we praise Hashem and Bless him, be thankful for the week we had etc.
So I am going to move on towards the end of the service. The part of the service where The Rabbi discusses the weeks Parsha and touches on the following weeks one too. The Rabbi said something on Saturday, which really touched me. The Rabbi pointed out 4 occasions where Moses was called upon to decide on how the Israelites would act during certain events, and each time when Moses did not know how to answer; he would turn to Hashem and ask him. Now I am a stubborn person and like to believe that I can do it all and I know it all and rarely ask for advice or for help until I am all out and down on my luck and am desperate. After listening to the Rabbi, I made a promise to myself to no longer be so ‘Hard Headed’ and ask for help when I need it. I know this isn’t an easy thing and I am not going to change right away…but I know that asking for help isn’t such a bad thing, it doesn’t make me stupid or weak.
Something else that I took from the Shabbat Morning Service, yesterday, was how when something is important we would make time for it. For years…pretty much my whole life, often I would validate not doing something because I never had the time for it. But strangely I have always managed to find time to binge watch something on TV or do something that would satisfy me now, but wouldn’t actually change my life. Why is that I never seem to have the time to read more of the Torah, or go to gym? Is it because I don’t find those things to be important? Now I know that Hashem is important. And so I need to prioritize some of my day to him.
In the day services, at Shul, the Torah is read. Something that I have seen many times now, is a woman reading from the Torah, and as much as I love it, I still find it so strange. My whole life when I went to Orthodox Synagogues; I never saw a women been giving the honor to stand on the Bima and read from the Torah. Next year at my graduation I may be given that opportunity, so I really need to invest more on learning on how to read and speak Hebrew.
It is quite funny how now whenever I see any Hebrew writing I often try and read it out before looking for the transliteration. 2 weeks I missed a Hebrew glass, and so I had to make time to catch up on the work. Figured I would try and do the work on my own, instead of just listening in on the recorded lesson on OneDrive. Turns out I actually worked a few pages ahead and the work that I did was actually all correct. I was quite proud of myself for managing to work ahead and get the Hebrew words write. Okay I didn’t get the meaning of the words but got the transliteration right and picked up on a few things. So I can do this! I just need to believe in myself a bit more.