While cleaning….still got lots to do

Figured I would tackle the kitchen first!!!

750ml of Smirnoff Vodka. When I walked into the study there was a 6 pack of Savannah Premium, half already drunk.

Tonight I am meant to join an Alanon meeting, but I have way too much to do, so gonna join later in the week.

After taking the picture I figured I would put the bottle of  Vodka in his work backpack, even though it is pretty much empty.

I know marriage is not easy and it isn’t all strawberries dipped in chocolate and romantic cruises and kisses under the sunset, but is it meant to be this hard?

Yesterday I went to my friends new flat…a tiny 1 bedroom place but it was her place and even though she would love to be married and be sharing her life with someone she could love fully and he would love her back, I can’t say that I don’t envy her.

Every now and then he will laugh as he tells me how if I cheated he would have no problem killing that guy and then me too. I am not scared for  myself, but I do live in some sort of fear.

My life sucks and I am slowly realizing that my few happy days are not enough for the shit ones I have to deal with every weekend. 😪

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February 27, 2022

Jesus girl. I don’t know why you put up with shit like that!!!

February 27, 2022

I don’t know either. A huge part of me wishes I had the strength to tell him to fuck off. Maybe I should use the next month getting all my ducks in a row and then kick him out.