centre bullet

blank canvas, time is ticking.

chores to do. there’s still time to say something worthwhile.

I am tired of distractions, yet my brain lacks the self control to be so focused on nothing. it’s exhausting to keep those demons and shadows at bay. to let the light shine in and illuminate.. no please, not that corner..

My dreams are divided. I seldom remember them but the feeling stays for a little while, for better or worse. Some I try to hold on to, like being loved unconditionally and infinitely. a hug that reaches my soul. Then some are dark, confusing, left unfinished. I don’t want to live there, but something does, and it requires my presence. It’s a gamble each night, not knowing what I’ll receive, or what I’ll even remember.

There’s too much to do all the time. And when I have time, I don’t want to do it because that time is so precious why would I spend it like that? like a walking human doing.. I’m tired. It must stop, the pressure is literally killing who I am.  I need to feel human. There is nothing else more important.