The day begins …

… peaceful and quiet.  It feels like I am finally accepting that summer is over.  Usually I embrace autumn … the lovely change of seasons … this year though feels like I didn’t even experience summer.  Too busy? Not busy enough?? Does it really matter???  Summer has gently slipped into the past, and shorter days have taken over.  Isn’t it interesting how Nature teaches us about change … life and death and life again.  No matter how busy or not busy we are, Nature just rolls along doing its thing.  I will admit that since writing I am in a depression seems to have broken it open, and now I can see all its guts and goo.  Hahahah I remember dissecting my first frog in grade 7 …. at that age, I went along with all the girls with being grossed out and all that, but deep inside, I wanted to Know what made the frog work … exactly like wanting to Know what makes the depression work … thing is, the depression isn’t dead with its legs pinned to a piece of cardboard … it’s quite alive and kicking.  I’m patient … mostly … with life and discovering the secrets of the Universe … but honestly, this year has been a struggle, and it seems the only thing I have to work with is the depression and its guts.  I don’t want it to grow any more, and the last string of pretty darn amazing days has made me understand better how two things can be true at the same time.  Is poking around the depression going to feed it and make it grow, or weaken it?  I guess that’s something I will find out …