#hatred

I never knew what I wanted to be when I grew up. All I knew is that I wanted to be a Mom. I got pregnant. It was twins. I found out laying in the hospital bed for pains in my side. No one was allowed with me due to Covid. I was in shock.…

Such melodramatic titles. I’m still hiding myself, sorry to repeat. My dark side just came out hard core 3 years ago and nearly fully blotted out everything good in me. And I’ve regained a lot of the good that was lost, but only by — muting parts of myself. It was the self hatred. It…

I recently wrote about grief, and the last few months have slowly brought me to a life of extreme anxiety and depression. I spent months, up all night after work wondering if I was going to die out of no where, what I would do if I lost someone else, and basically swimming in my…