Bad at this

Ok, I accept that I have been very unsuccessful at keeping up here. My life has been a bit of a whirlwind since June so writing in here has not been a priority.  But, It seems we are in phase where life will settle down like it does in the quiet of winter.

I honestly don’rt have any idea what I wrote about last.  School was it?
I went back and peeked, the last time I wrote was mid/late August. About someone who I never even actually met. I know.  I can be ridiculous, but I know myself.

Actually, after I talked to that person for a couple of days he bored me.  Then not long after that I went on a lunch date with someone else. The dude took me to McDonalds (I’m a vegetarian) and I paid for my own salad.  After which, he wanted to pursue adult activities in his car, which I immediately felt disgustingly sick about.  I got back in my car and drove back to work the whole time talking to my self saying things like ” ugh what did you do?” and ” why did you do that?”  I realized that not only was I really not interested in this person, he didn’t respect me at all, and being even lunchbreak intimate with someone make me feel like I was betraying Penn.  Well, not betraying him exactly, but betraying my own feelings for him.  I felt guilty and like I had let myself down.

After that I deleted all of my dating apps and that’s where I stand right now.  Not dating, not looking. Not ready.


I did end up being able to register for school but I got stuck with 2 half semester classes.  So far I have done well in all of my classes.  I have enjoyed all of my classes for the most part.  Music appreciation was a pleasure, and I really have enjoyed the business classes that I have taken.  However, I despise my Study Skills class.  Its fucking horrible.  Study skills is the most ridiculous busywork baby bullshit class I have ever taken. In a semester where I have to do both a full business plan and a research paper, THIS is the class that is giving out between 4 and 7 assignments a week.  Not even my 8 week long English comp II class gives this much work.  And I mean, I don’t have a problem with doing work.  I DO have a problem with being told to copy questions verbatim from the book only to answer them with a yes or no and tally my score. Its actual busywork.  Like 13th grade busywork.  Please tell me what copying book text for a self assessment is going to do to improve my ability to study.  Fuck that class, its inane.

Work is still fantastic.  I am learning new things every day and I have actual medical insurance!  I’m still getting the hang of some things, but I like the work I do. I manage the service dept and work tier 1 support tickets while supervising the other customer service rep.  I’m very happy there, I know that my experience got me there, but I also know that I am blessed to have this job. Straight up.


We moved into our new place the last few days of October. Trav came home for a week and we got so much help from good people that I am eternally grateful. My nephew had a couple of friends help and my friend Sherm helped us to load, move and unload the truck.  It was hectic and tiring and cathartic.  that whole moving process was  a purge for each of us.  We threw out a houseload of stuff.  neighborhood people came buy and picked through most of our stuff and by the time we left there was barely anything left out to take.  I’m glad that someone will get use out of those things we left.  My friend Sherm really has been there for me.  We have known each other about a year and a half and we’ve become close.  He has feelings for me, but I try to keep it very casual between us.  I’m not there with it.

Since we’re a family of witches, we buried some things int he yard that we didn’t want to take with us spiritually.   I had been finding myself dwelling on the betrayal of the family perpetrated by Travs ex.  I would allow myself to get so worked up and angry over it all and let myself get really tangled up in the negative feelings and talk about him.  So much so, that it was bringing down my own energy, which was just me allowing his toxicity to continue influencing me.  Since our last day at the house (that we lovingly nicknamed  “The Crossroads” last year – foreshadow much?) was Samhain, our very last act there was to hod a funeral of sorts inthe back yard.  We dug a hole and buried a box full of things we want to get rid of.  Symbolic perhaps… but I don talk about the betrayer anymore.  I think that demon has finally been exorcised.

The new place is FANTASTIC.  There were many hiccups getting in here (the unit was absolutely not ready for us to move in on the day we moved in. there is a LAUNDRY LIST of minor maintenance requests but as a whole?  We love it.  Its a 4 bedroom townhouse and I have the master suite with a bad ass bathtub (with jets).  The neighbors are nice regular people, a lot of military families.  It stays pretty quiet here too.

I still have to unpack my room fully. Its a work in progress, but much like some other things I need to get done, school and work take first priority. My room will get clean eventually.

Yesterday, we hosted Thanksgiving at our place.  I loved it. I love to cook for people.  My sister came over and we had a few other people come by throughout the day. There was way too much food, way too much sugar and way too much pot, but Thanksgiving is always an acceptable day to be extra bout everything. It was just good to have my house filled with people I really love.

Finally, I have a new baby kitty cat.  His name is Graybles, but we mostly call him Chunk because food is his favorite thing.  He is a little grey tabby with leopard spots on his belly.  Right now we are fostering his sister too, but Sherm is going to take her when he gets his place fixed up.  They are absolute pure JOY.  I love watching them play and they are two of the most cuddly kitties I have ever seen.  they just love sleeping and eating a playing.  They are about 10 or 12 weeks old and they have been giving me life.

I cant even begin to list all of the books I have listened to lately. Though, I did listen to The Name of the wind and The Wise Mans Fear twice more each. They are my favorite books.  If you like fantasy, you should read  -or if you prefer, listen, to them.  By Patrick Rothfuss.  They are fantastic.

I watched all of Sabrina on netflix, didnt hate it.  I finished House of Cards and will miss it.  Oh I also took up crocheting while I watched all of Black Sales and OMG it was AMAZING!  Totally made me want to be a pirate. Very underrated show, very very very good.  My granny square blanket, will probably look messy and weird, but it will be warm.

Went to see Venom last weekend, i liked it..  I might go see something tomorrow too.  I want to start doing that again. I hereby reinstate my Saturday morning movie ritual.  See? That wasn’t so hard!

I hope you all had a wonderful Thanksgiving if you are in the US and a wonderful Thursday if you dont.

Happy Weekend 🙂


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November 25, 2018

congrats on your new home….