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What I want…

June 23, 2019
someone I know how to comfort and knows how to comfort me. Someone who will share my mission and work. Someone who values my passion and the associated ups and downs that come with it. someone who has unconditional love for me. Someone I will unconditionally love  
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Recent Entries

  • It’s all about expectations…. is that all there is???
    March 15, 2019
    When my kids were young, I used to travel a lot for work. When I was on a trip I was always lonely and missed home.  I'd call home, but my wife wasn't much of a talker on the phone.  Or maybe it was just that we didn't know how to talk to each other…
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  • Finding an ear….
    February 6, 2019
    My best friend is also my wife's best friend... we met through her.  I had the chance to jump dump my issues and it was helpful to just get it out. My wife is going through a bad time and so am I... we are both 51... our first daughter went off to college... second…
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  • I am tormented by demons….
    January 27, 2019
    I can't anticipate their arrival, but I know them when enter my head.  They are the demons that have haunted my thoughts for as long as I can remember.  They are demons of self doubt, of not belonging and of not being accepted and wanted for who I am. The source is probably obvious...  My…
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  • Topics for future writing…
    January 22, 2019
    Explore my relationships Revisit my sexual experiences look at the moments that changed my life What do you think?  leave a note in comments.
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  • Funny… I must be feeling better…
    January 22, 2019
    When I am feeling better, I don't really have the need to write.  I thought I would just mention this fact so that I knew today and the last few have been pretty good days.  No asthma is a big part of why I am better.  Also, I have reconciled that if the company fails,…
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  • Things are better right now…
    January 19, 2019
    Not as depressed!  Not sure why!  The startup seems to be going better.  Still full of ambiguity and the team isn't yet jelled but we have a clear path forward for now... it will either work or not... we will know by July!
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  • Time for a change?
    January 19, 2019
    I wrote this on Jan 13, 2019 before I had this account reclaimed... great to keep it in one place I am depressed…. I haven’t felt this way since I was 19 or 20.   Back then, I was feeling worthless.  I lacked direction.  I didn’t feel like I belonged anywhere.  However, in just 2 years,…
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  • Will I ever stop thinking this way?
    October 20, 2011
    I remember when we were dating I had hints of it... but it really didnt come to a head until we were living together. When we first started dating, we would see each other on the weekends and I would sleep over.  At first, we might have sex each night I was there... but quickly it…
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  • Love me like Jack!
    September 12, 2011
    I saw a segment on the Today show about Jackie Kennedy's memoirs that were on tape.  When asked how Jackie felt about Jack's philandering... the reporter made a comment..."most men in america would love to be loved like Jackie loved Jack"   she loved him and nurtured...
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