אני קושית יפה/I’m a Cute Black Girl Pg 29

I cannot help it…

The past few days I have been reading Deuteronomy in the Tanakh and last night I read the passage where Hashem gives Moses his Rules and Laws, for the Israelites, and how they are written onto 2 tablets.

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The 1 commandment I recited over and over and over again in my head was the last one.

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If I am being honest I break that commandment every day and I break it another of times during the day.

When I am driving and I see someone in a nice car, I would be lying if I said I wasn’t jealous on some level and didn’t wish that I had that car.

When I look and see what houses are on the marker online or when I drive past beautiful houses, again I would be lying if I said I didn’t wish I lived in that house and called it my home.

When I wander around and see someone with nice shoes on, or holding a nice phone, or buying something that I would rather have…everyday and all day I see people with something that I wish I had.

I never thought that having those feelings and desires was something so bad that Hashem would inscribe on a tablet how we ought to not carry those feelings, and how having those feelings would be enough to warrant a punishment from him.

I think this is a topic I should bring up with my Rabbi.

I am only in passage 6 of Deuteronomy…I have about 50 or more pages to go, I am sure my answer lies further in the Tanakh.

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April 22, 2022

I definitely break this commandment.  It’s hard not to want better and hard not to feel envious of others who have that.  I do try to be happy for others when they get new things, though.

April 22, 2022

Yeah, I don’t get mean jealous and wish them ill, I just also want that thing that they have! I do feel like G-d is asking a little too much of us, when he says we mustn’t covet what our neighbor has. I mean I wouldn’t steal their thing or have an affair with their partner but I don’t see what is wrong with not aspiring to have that and be that too?