Recent Entries

• No drama mama

  January 16, 2021

  Life is boring when you have no drama. Is it why I choose to hold on to it? Til my hands fuckin bleed but dont you dare let go of that fuckin rope! In it, is all your existence and no space for mercy. Because mercy will remind you that your life is simply dull…

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• Fine is another word for boiled fish

  January 16, 2021

  “What else could they do—with that sort of character?” “Throw out your misperceptions and you’ll be fine. (And who’s stopping you from throwing them out?) Marcus Aurelius – Meditations. “Never say of anything, “I have lost it”; but, “I have returned it.” Is your child dead? It is returned. Is you...

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• It would of never worked

  January 14, 2021

  His ego is too big. He's a great white shark that starves himself to death. He runs away from problems, he sabotages anything and everything because he doesn't think he deserves it. He thinks he only deserves pain and that's why he drinks too much and never admits that he has a drinking problem. ...

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• Trust is a strong word

  January 13, 2021

  Will I be able to trust? Trust in way that fills secure, legit and safe. Trust in a way that I know I won't get betrayed. Wouldn't that be the nicest feeling ever? Trust is for the naive, for the ones who never had their hearts broken, for the ones who haven't been stabbed in…

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• Email (af XIV)

  January 10, 2021

  I wrote him an email, thought it was pretty good and well thought out. There's nothing in it that I would change, I don't know how it sounded to him, when he read it, he wouldn't have agreed because he wouldn't agree to take responsibility for the drama. He's a coward. He's scared to be…

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• Charlie

  December 29, 2020

  I was in love with a narcissist when I was 19. I woulda died for him.☠ Charlie was one of a kind, cool cat. But something was off when  I first got to know him; he seemed hang up on his ex and he was acting like "love doesn't exist" attitude. He cheated on me,…

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• Relationship RED Flags – Pluto version

  December 25, 2020

  Poor Communicator-🕵 📞they keep a lot of secrets and can't tell you what they feel, maybe you think it's a shyness problem so you try to figure out their feelings for them. Are you a problem solver? Like to solve mysteries? This one's for you. Down the line when shit hits the fan and the…

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• Mommy Dearest

  December 23, 2020

  She asked what kind of mother I hoped she would be? I dont know. Does it even matter now? Does it even make a difference it's been 23 years since I've moved in with her, back when I was 2 months shy of 11. The vulnerable little me. The one who needed nurturing, only to…

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• Simmering Anger

  December 22, 2020

  How does shitty trauma affect my life now? I'll tell you how. It makes me not trust men. No, wait. It makes me not trust men as a default. It makes me take my time to get to know someone. I don't wanna a kiss on the 1st date! Fuck that, gotta have to trust…

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