I'm here to share my deepest thoughts
comments always welcome
thank you for reading
NO FRIEND REQUESTS

Latest Entry

A strange Thank U

May 25, 2023
A special thank you to Marin: Because of you, I don't rush into sleeping with a man and because of you, I'm VERY weary of any man that I let into my space and VERY weary of when a man makes me feel like my opinions don't matter. And I'm VERY weary of when he…
Continue Reading...

Recent Entries

  • Free from Hell hole
    April 24, 2023
    Finally free from all my exes. Don't feel shit for them anymore. The occasional anger pops up, anger at them and anger at myself for hoping for a bright outcome. Especially Max, I cried last time 'cause of him and here I thought I was over him but yet had hope of him being mine…
    Continue Reading...
  • how to dismantle shared fantasy
    April 18, 2023
    GO STEP BY STEP WITH THERAPIST DEFINE EACH FANTASY GRIEVE IT- this will never happen and this will never happen it- allow the grieving to pass- the parts that u likedĀ  u can regroup to yourself ID WHAT U WANT IN THE NEXT RELATIONSHIP
    Continue Reading...
  • Max part 2500
    April 5, 2023
    I have no feelings for him. I haven't in a while, it's hard to connect to someone who doesn't even want you around. He doesn't want me, doesn't talk to me unless being forced, it's like pulling a donkey that wants to go the opposite direction. Why am I holding on to this stupid donkey?…
    Continue Reading...
  • Letter to his soul- m.
    February 10, 2023
    I never regret the lessons that I learn from the men that I meet. And I also don't wanna feel sorry for myself because I don't want those hard lessons to go to waste. The best lesson is to always apply the knowledge you learned the hard way. That way it's not time wasted. That…
    Continue Reading...
  • Round and around
    February 3, 2023
    I know it's over. But is it really over? Is it easier to mourn the pain of a lost pain than it is to be bored and feel nothing? I sit around with nothing to do. I try to entertain myself. Do I need supply? Do I crave it? Do I need attention? Do I…
    Continue Reading...
  • To to seen
    January 1, 2023
    My anger is deep deep sadness. The sadness of betrayal, the sadness of being rejected, the sadness of an ending. All those things are sad but what lies underneath is the need to be seen. It's our basic human need. Just like a toddler who reaches out to you when you get distracted, to that…
    Continue Reading...
  • P. so called friends (personal)
    December 19, 2022
    I don't know why I care about her opinion when she literally contributed NOTHING to my life- not even support of ANY kind- I was just her punching bag for her own self-hate. Your life is in a pile of shit- you never had a healthy relationship, you're full of depression and you're telling me…
    Continue Reading...
  • BIGGEST HEARTBREAK
    December 13, 2022
    It's hard to say goodbye to someone who you wish was still in your life. I don't want to say goodbye, I have to. I have to because if let him back in, he will continue the same pattern. It's a classic formula for disrespect. Once it's set, there is no changing it no matter…
    Continue Reading...
  • Toxic friends 2.0
    December 12, 2022
    It's one thing to know which friends are toxic and to know when to keep your distance but it's another thing to be in the process of figuring out that that bitch who keeps invalidating you is toxic AF. And at first, it's confusing because you already let her into your world. You already establish...
    Continue Reading...

Search Entries

  • Use dropdowns or search terms above to find entries.