#mental

I remember when they used to speak to me. Voices that were more like my family than my own family was. Not just cruel, but kind. Much like the Reverend Mother, I both loved and hated them.   I remember when Mother used to guide me. A voice from beyond, visions of brilliance and beauty.…

I was six when it first started. I remember the brown and white walls of the hospital room, being held down by the nurses as they yelled at you, demanding to know why I was so dehydrated. I stayed quiet, too afraid to tell them that I’d heard a voice telling me the drinks were…

I smoked in studio yesterday. I walked in studio with the producer who is married. The main producer I work with is married too. There I was, in studio, with two married men. But of course, I stay wearing baggy clothes and never remotely flirting. I always conduct myself in a classy manner. I mad...

These last 4 months have been extremely tough on my heart and mental state. I have been suffering from cognitive dissonance. To those of you who don't know what cognitive dissonance means, it is basically having two thoughts that contradict each other and makes it difficult for you to come to a c...

28/10/2022 Hello hello there   so im new here, ive had an online diary for like years so the concept is not new to me, anyway i decided i should change platforms since my other online diary was on a eating disorder platform (formerly called mpa but the name has changed to like ed community&h...

SAY IT WITH ME! I am powerful potential I am powerful potential I am powerful potential Repeat until you believe it.

I spent the entire day thinking I was having a heart attack. I am someone who suffers from a variety of mental health issues. My journey goes something like this: I began becoming afraid of things I was previously not afraid of; the biggest example being flying. I was prescribed some medication t...

Tomorrow...does it have to come? Whether for the better or the worse, yes...for many people. This is the first time I've posted to OD in a long time.  Basically, this year has been a very shitful one for me for these reasons: One long-time friend I've had since 2011 suddenly turning against me an...

Well, here goes. For three days I've been wondering where to start. Perfectionist syndrome. Screw it. I just need to start getting stuff out. So here it goes, just bloody well start writing. I want to keep a journal to track my progress with micro dosing. I'm going to try two medicines. Psilocybi...

I'm intrigued about drugs. Openly. I would like to explore what it's like to do shrooms and the experience of it all. I struggle daily mentally with untreated ADHD and have a whole slew of medication that... Kind of helps? I think? It has been awhile so to be honest, whatever *this* is, is my&hel...