#trauma

I'm officially caught up on my life since I was last here. I was talking to Zoe about it. I think we may have found my trauma? Although, I'm not sure trauma is the correct terminology here as I'm not sure it is actually trauma. I tried looking for a definition of trauma, and all I…

Time sort of feels like it’s frozen, you know? Not really time, but sort of everything else. I can remember the ways that I used to feel all the time, but all those feelings are frozen too. Like I don’t feel much of anything except for all the bad things people are always telling me…

Halloween is just around the corner. Some people go all out for Halloween and it always amazes me. I took my niece and nephew trick-or-treating last year and there were some unbelievable houses with fabulous decorations. I love the creative and artistic part of Halloween. The time and effort that...

I was going through old emails and noticed I missed an email from the Diary Master back in August saying they had my diary available to restore. I guess I missed the email because August 2020 was a horrible month for me. In August 2020 I finally took my ass to rehab to deal with…

I never knew what I wanted to be when I grew up. All I knew is that I wanted to be a Mom. I got pregnant. It was twins. I found out laying in the hospital bed for pains in my side. No one was allowed with me due to Covid. I was in shock.…

I have decided to start this diary as a way to process my own thoughts on my journey of re-learning if you will, a sort of self-counselling. In January of 2021, I turned 26 years old. As I am approaching my 30s I am more focused on wanting to move away from my childhood trauma…

I am finding out so much more about myself  through therapy and introspection. One thing I’ve uncovered through research  and talking with my therapist is that I was misdiagnosed. I was diagnosed with Bi Polar 2 disorder originally after only sitting down with a psychiatrist for 30 min. Now I fin...

I feel like I am finally moving forward. The things that used to bother me don’t anymore. Even having a particular person like my photo on Facebook with their ghost account didn’t phase me. I thought it was odd that they used their real name and were being so obvious, but quickly realized they we...

When I moved to the southern state, I knew I had a clean start.  I had breath of fresh air, and a new lease on life.  I don't remember much of my first day at my new school, but I do vividly remember my first lie.  I was sitting in my foreign language class, and…