Matthew 7:17

A good tree produces good fruit, and a bad tree produces bad fruit.

I was doing some unpacking at my new home today and found my certificate of baptism. I was baptized on July 17th, 2019 (7:17) It made me think about the gifts God has given me. On March 17th when my dissolution in final I will have been separated from my husband for 7 months (7:17) Apparently 17 symbolizes overcoming the enemy and complete victory; at least that is what says. My baby girl turns 2 years old tomorrow, we celebrated Saturday with tea for two party. It was a mad around here. We were surrounded by amazing friends and family and so much love. It is crazy how picking fruit from the wrong tree can change who you are. I am spending Valentine’s Day with my best gift from God, my daughter. It is the 1st Valentine’s Day I have had without my husband in 10 years, but I feel less lonely today than I ever did with him. I miss my Iron Lobster more than him; I know he is proud of me.  I am feeling conflicted, it was baptism Sunday at my home church yesterday, I remembered being baptized there. I have sacrificed everything from my old life, but I am struggling to transition to a new church. It just feels really unfair that I did everything right and my entire life has been turned upside down. My home church is smaller, and everyone knows me and my daughter. They offered so much support and prayer during our 117 days in the NICU. It feels like home and feels safe. It isn’t emotionally or psychological safe for me to be around my ex and it is good for him to take our daughter to a safe place. I will make this last sacrifice for her. Ill trust God, maybe he is telling me it is time to grow some more. Maybe he is telling me there are bigger and better things for me and it is time to level up. I don’t really enjoy being noticed by everyone anyway, I do better 1:1. Maybe a bigger church is better, I can hide in the shadows. If you add up the numbers of my new home address, they equal 7! I learned about that woman at the well in the 7th month of 2021. Thank you, God, for my gifts.

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