Loves to make things, body modding/grinding and create new worlds but rarely ever has time to do half of what she/it wants too .

She/It also have the bad habbit of writing Emo poetry and being a general mess I appologise for this. I try not to be a human wrecking ball but sometimes I can't help myself.

Latest Entry

Meandering Monday

December 9, 2019
Monday 9th December, 2019 Dear Diary, Today I successfully went for a blood test (at 9:40!) and rearranged my occupational health assessment. I went for a walk to, just my normal meander along the Mersey and up to the shops takes about an hour. I was so tired, actually I have been all day the&hel...
Continue Reading...

Recent Entries

  • Sunday 8th December
    December 8, 2019
    Sunday 8th December Dear Diary, Today was an OK day, we had the nurse come round to check on us she asserted that their is a backup plan should CMT not want to see me after my assessment on Friday im unsure if that im ill enough for them. I don't know we will find…
    Continue Reading...
  • best for me
    November 20, 2019
    We talked to mum today, fuck goddammit. :| dammit. She Wants Whats Best For Me. capitalized for effect, her idea of best, she needs to be in control she always does and we feel like we're fighting like always to be something other than in her control, some independent person or least independent ...
    Continue Reading...
  • anxiety fueled
    November 19, 2019
      💚 Anxiety is becoming more and more of an issue: I avoided going into work today for a support meeting to discuss a phased return. I will rearrange it for Thursday tomorrow... I'll do better or well I have to do better, (I'm also not supposed to be so harsh on myself either) Doctor…
    Continue Reading...
  • sheltered
    November 8, 2019
    Spent the past week in sheltered accommodation , it was actually really relaxing and quite good as a time out for everything, managed to get some of my thoughts in order. I said I'd try. try to continue. try to be better again Back home now *is overwhelmed flops in bed for the day* bleh…
    Continue Reading...
  • bad decisions
    October 31, 2019
    5 days later the light went out a brief spell of unconciousness is a day brief? Nothing but worry was achived It now hurts to eat and drink my throat wasn't meant to have tubes down it saved my life, a relief to everyone not me The sounds drove me crazy The beds move. running,…
    Continue Reading...
  • It falls apart
    October 24, 2019
    Wish I didn't ruin every relationship. Kolin says he Ls me... how long do you recon itll be till I make him hate me? Claire doesn't bother telling me about her dj set or well anything I argue with my mum over crap most ppl would be grateful for. I feel like I should go…
    Continue Reading...
  • ventures into futures.
    October 23, 2019
    I spent 4 days with my mum. She called it a holiday. We went to york, she complained about me being late despite it not being my fault and despite that she had told me its your holiday arrive when your ready. We looked around york everything I wanted to do "hey lets look in…
    Continue Reading...
  • Primodial weekend.
    September 30, 2019
    This weekend I went to an Primordial radio event, "big bang 3" in Cianester this weekend, tis a rock and metal internet radio which I like, They put on an event there for their birthday, I went last year for the first time it was a good fun, this year...idk It was OK the nu-metal…
    Continue Reading...
  • rebooting me
    September 22, 2019
    Sometimes we all need a reboot I want to reboot this blog, its not you know free and not completely personalisable like my own word press instance would be, but I'm too nervous to actually put that on the internet and I messed up SSL like half a year ago or something, so I'll stick…
    Continue Reading...

Search Entries

  • Use dropdowns or search terms above to find entries.

Chapters